The Official Mark And Zak Show Homepage

UPDATED 10/25

#1
TO HEAR CHASE SAYING THAT HE HAS LICKED HIS OWN DICK THEN CLICK HERE!! #2
TO HEAR CHASE SAYING THAT HE WANTS TO HAVE SEX WITH BABOONS THEN CLICK HERE!! #3
TO HEAR CHASE SAYING SOMETHING STUPID THEN CLICK HERE!!
#4
TO HEAR CHASE MAKING IT CLEAR TO US THAT HE LIKES TO HAVE SEX WITH BABOONS CLICK HERE!!
#5
TO HEAR LORI TRYING TO KISS MARK THEN CLICK HERE!! To Hear All The Rest Of The Sounds From Jens Party Then Click This

Here Are Some Things That We Have For Auction :

Mark's And Zak's Red Speedos Not Washed : $999,999,999,999,999,999,999,999,999,999,999,999,999.99 by Megan Moran Because She Loves Mark And Zak's Underware And Insists That We Do Not Wash Them Wen We Send Them TO HerClick Here To Bid
Mark And Zak's Autograph : $150.00 By: Someone who did not put their name . Click Here To Bid

Visit the mark and zak show store and buy some cool stuff cause we get money wen u buy some cd's or something . Click Here To Goto The Store

Monday August 2nd - Mark And Zak Run Around The Track At Monty Tech In Nothing But Their Boxers.......Later On They Have Anal Sex With Crutches .
Friday August 6th - Mark And Zak Goto The SearsTown Mall And Lay On The Floors.....Chris The Dope Does A Crappy Job On The Camera So No Footage Is Shown Here , We Do Do A Good Job At Harassing The People At Radio Shack Though .
Saturday August 7th - Mark And Zak Run Around The Track At Monty Tech In Red Speedos And Later They Complain About Lost Loves .
Sunday August 8th - Mark And Gus Goto Searstown Mall And get kicked outa mcdonalds they get chased by a big black woman and then go home .
Saturday August 14th - Mark Zak And Dan Goto the searstown mall and get kicked out of every store they go into including victorias secret and sears , we got chased be an angry dwarf and we rubbed whipped cream all over our faces . it was lots of fun , later we got threatened by cops who told us that they would sue us and then we saw caitlin stone.... thats all . ohh yea then we saw scott and he made a funny face at us and told us somethin about sam .

wow boy o boy does that sound fun!! i was wondering if i could come on one of your shows where you stroke the animals genital areas??? i would really appreciate it ya know!! signed you good fan. jack mehoff love all Sent in By : [email protected]
Reply : Thank You Crrider , It Is Lots Of Fun To Be On The Mark And Zak Show ......Although , it does take lots of time and practice . We would let u come on the show but we no longer are doing disguisting things like touching animals anymore . We think it is very gross . Thank you and Have A Nice Day ......Ohh yes please remember to see us wen we come to a mall near you wearing only our red speedos .
look out for the crazy antics of mark and zak on "The Mark and zak Show".. I'm sure you'll be in for a good laugh or two or twenty.. It premiers August 21 after the Tom Green Show and before Loveline.. If you don't watch it Look out for Mark and Zak because they will hunt you down and rip off any personal parts you may need for future reproduction.. Thank you and have a nice day. Located On Think69696's Profile Reply : Thank You Think69696 , Those Were Very Nice Things That U Said about the mark and zak show so u can have a cookie . Have A Nice Day .
ive seen these guys in action and man r they funny,i piss myself just lookin at these two freakin goofs,o well,watch the show whenever its on cuz its gunna be dope man,k?or ill hafta rip off and appendage that you'll need in the future for reproduction,lol Sent In By [email protected] Reply : Yes , Thank You Mr.Sabbath984 , Please Dont " Piss Yourself While U Are Watching The Show Because Wen U Watch It Again It Might Bring Back Bad Memories . Have A Nice Day .
The Mark and Zak show kicks ass! Just don't get arrested....k? Love, Mark's Big Sis....Kerri :-) Sent In By : [email protected] AKA Marks Big Sis Reply : Thank You Very Much , We Will Try Not To Get Arrested Just For You............Ohhhh Yea Heres A Cookie . Have a Nice Day .
Whoa dude,the mark and zak show..touching animals in theyre genital areas..sounds coo.umm hey wait isnt that illegal or something.damn dont end up in jail cause then you might share a cell with big frank or something and that wouldnt be cool at all.i have a cool idea for u guys.how bout u steal some vietnameese hookers and trick them into wearing large santa clause suits while they run down main street hollering --watch the mark and zak show august 21 after tom green and after loveline--yeah thatd be pretty phat advertising.yeah well i hear my mom calling.l8er Sent In By : [email protected] Reply : Thank you xboardx697 , Once Again We Refuse To Touch Anymore Animals In The Genetal Area . We Think That It Is Very Gross And We Refuse To Do It . That Is A Very Good Idea Though With The Hookers . We Will Have To Do That Later . Have A Nice Day ........Ohhh yea Heres A Cookie .
u guys sound mad funny, and ill be sure 2 watch u'r show right after the tom green show and b-4 loveline, peace out! stay cool Sent In By : [email protected] Reply : Thank you Luv2Thugz , It Is Going To Be quite Funny . Thank You For Watching Our Show . B4 I Forget , Heres A Cookie . Have A Nice Day .
you guys really kick!!!!! im your biggest fan!!!! i used to be jerry garcias biggest fan but not no more.... i was just wondering if this show biz. gets you guys mad girlz cuz i know how you guys couldnt get any b4 and i was just wondering if its helping you out any having this cool show, well anyways i just wanted to say you guys da bomb diggaties!! i gotta jet so power to the pokemons!!!! peace out Sent In By : [email protected] Reply : Thank You Icywu15 , U May Think That Your Our Biggest Fan But You Are Realli Not . In Fact Our Biggest Fan Is Tom Hanks , Thats Right Tom Hanks . Hes Been Folowing Our Careers From The Biginning . Thank You Tom . U Can Have A Cookie I Guess .

u guys sound pretty cool. i hope u guys have nice bodies if ur running around in ur undies. but ill watch u guys neways. keep it real. PEACE! Sent In By : [email protected] Reply : Thank You PhAtWu143 , Yes We Have Very Nice Bodies......In Fact We Are The Original Lades Men And We CAn Get Any LAdies That We Want To Because WE ARE THE LADIES MEN . Thank You And Have A Nice Day . I Only Have One Cookie Left So U Dont Get 1 . Sorry .
hey guys!! im mark and zaks close friend and ive seen some of their work and i must say it is fabulous!!! i love their show and the little skits they do. personnaly im a little sad to see the animal belly rubbing go, ya know, i was a big fan of that but im sure there will be better ideas along the way!!! i hope their show goes big!! dont forget to tune in on mtv after tom green and b4 loveline the show is awesome so watch it !!! Sent In By : [email protected] Reply : Thank You Mister Gvadidas . I Was Very Dissapointed Too Wen We Decited To Take Animal Touching Off The Show . It Hurt Me Alot , But I Think It Was The Best Thing To Do . Our Show Has Already Hit It Big , We Are Premiering On August 21 Right After The Tom Green Show And Right Before Loveline . Remember To Watch . Gus.......U Can Have The Last Cookie . Have A Nice Day .
lol zak u are too funny Sent In By : [email protected] Reply : Thank You Bags3756 , Short And Right To The Point ....Just The Way I Like It . Sorry , No More Cookies .
Hell Boys ~ I think that it was TOTALLY wrong what you put on the internet. And NO BODIES permission was asked. So don't you think that it was the littlest bit wrong? I do think so! I think you guys should take those sounsd off the Internet and Ask the people THEN if they say it's Ok, but them back on. It'd be the best thing to do! I like your show and Support it but I don't think that is right! MARK I LOVE YOU! ZAK - Have fun in FL. - HolsADIDAS Change message text width in Settings. Sent In By :[email protected] REPLY : IF U DONT HAVE ANYTHING GOOD TO SAY THEN DONT SAY ANYTHING AT ALL . People Shouldnt BE Stupid Drunks . Dont Be A Jewrk And We Wont Do Things Like That . Be Happy That I Didnt Put All Your Last Names . NO......U cant have a cookie , i got a new box 2day too.....BYE..YOU CANT PLAY WITH MY TOYS NO MORE!!!!!!
I thought the sound bites were funny as hell!!! You know, 9 times out of 10, people reveal their TRUE FEELINGS when they are drunk.....now think about that one all you baboon lovers! HA! Keep up the good work...I've got PLENTY of bail money set aside! Can I have a cookie, please? Mark's big sis ~ Kerri REPLY : Thank You once again....The sound bytes are very funny , We will probally need the bail money soon , We'll give u a call from the police department Soon . I Just Got A New Box Of Cookies.......Chocolate!! U Can Have 2 For All The Nice Remarks that u have given to us . Tootaloo
LOL.....this site is so funny guys! I just wanted to tell you that the recordings you have from the other night is so funny!! LOL...you gotta do that more often! Sent In By :[email protected] Reply : Yes , Once Again They Were Very Funny . We Will Be Adding Many More Very Soon . You Can Have A Cookie . Tootaloo!!
content: hey hey hey...i was wondering.......could you show some drunken animals on the show,uhh i mean yeah..wow thatd be mad sick dude.id def. pay money to see something like a rhino drunk on scotch or something..well thats just me.oh wait..i think that might be illegal?? SENT IN BY : [email protected] REPLY : THat Is A Very Good idea , are you obsessed with animals and petting and drunk lamas and stuff ???? I Think u need help and THAT is illegal and we do not promote that on the mark and zak show ...... U CANT HAVE A COOKIE!!!! if u want one then write back with something nice!! have a nice day
yo, that shit u put in there from the tape recorder thing ...HAHHAHA holy fuckin' shit i was retarded hah... phat page SENT IN BY : [email protected] REPLY : Chase u kick ass and all i have to say is that u fuckin kick wen your drunk so keep drinkin bro!! U can have like 865 cookies , Have a Nice Day
Yo boys, wud uuh wud uhh???? did you guys really talk to Tom Green.. If you did tell him i said wud up haha.. but seriously i'm hearing talk of this please let me know! YOUR ONE AND ONLY! DOPE! SENT IN BY : [email protected] REPLY : Thank you dope , You Are soo stupid you are a dope and you suck and i hate you and u are a dope and u cant have any cookies and u cant play with my toys and thats all!!!! actually u can have cookies cause u kick ass and u are the dope!! lata bro heres a cookie.......wait u can have 2 ok?
I Bid $20000000000000000.00 on the underware SENT IN BY : [email protected] REPLY : Do u think this page is some kind of fuckin joke???? do u have the money to back up what u say??? thats not funny at all !!! dont joke with the joksters , u know what??? im gonna put that on the page for a real bid and U have to pay it!!! thats right soo i hope u have like 2 bazzillion dollars to give us!!start savin your flower money!!!
Alright that was funny. Just don't get in anymore trouble you guys...k. But Zak im sure you don't care right. Zak i'll miss you though...don't forget me and we'll come visit you next august. You better be waiting. Mark i'll see you lata hun. <3 ya guys!!! SENT IN BY : [email protected] REPLY : Thanx meg u kick ass ... thanks for tha party and stuff . u've been a awesome friend . i love ya lots u can have a cookie , PEACE LOVE POKEMON
Hey Boys~ you guys are great! and tooooo funny!.....You're show is so funny! and WOW can't wait to see it! lol.....some of your filmings are pretty funny keep it up ok!....GOOD LUCK! SENT IN BY : [email protected] REPLY : Thanx KW we are the funniest people on the face of the earth . And i give all the power to tom hanks for helping us cause he is our Greatest Fan . U Can Have A Chocolate Cookie . PEACE LOVE POKEMON .
alright man ill stop with the animal shit....hey does that mean i get a cookie??phat page.l8er Sent In By : [email protected] Reply : SHIT???? we do not allow a potty mouth on the mark and zak show so that means that u do NOT get a cookie . Have a very pleasant day .
hey guys! I'm the dope's sister! he did a shitty job on the tape, but I still think you guys are funny shit and I love your show hehe. and zak I forgive for squirting me in the eye. yes it still works. Its sad that your moving away! do you think I could have a cookie? <3 the dope's sis ~cassie Sent In By :Stupid Retard Girl That Lives With The Dope REPLY:Hmmmmmmmmmm Let Me Think If i should give you a cookie??????NOOOO i will not give you a cookie . and what do you mean your eye still works???? i was TRYING to break it . and im not sorry. and u have no right calling yourself the dope's sister cause u cant be the dopes sister cause there is only one dope . and WHAT does this mean........"<3" HUH!!!!!! you dont love us either . You know what??? ill give you a cookie . here you go . r u eating it???? yummmmmmy its good huh???? WELL I POSIONED IT !!!!!!!! hahahahaha now u will have diherea forever . HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
Hey ZAKKY, Where'd you go!!! I already miss you. I neva got to say bye to you!!! I love you so much hun and miss ya lots. I'll see you next August and you BETA keep intouch with me or i'll kick your ass alright REPLY: Hey MEGGY , i love you very alot and i miss everyone and florida really sucks and i have to go cause i am going to cry.......................................
why are penises called penises...i think they should be called flockhumbets. it sounds cooler and its easier to spell. and no i dont believe in capitals or proper punctuation. -oabao-> Sent In By : [email protected] REPLY: hmmm well oabao , this is a very interesting story , it goes back a long way to the time that men used to grow corn , wen they were planting their corn the chipmunks used to get into the corn and eat it all up , they were very very scared so one day one man was peeing in the corn fields because he was too lazy to go inside , well to make a long story short the chipmunks saw him and were scared so they made loud noises and the president of the chipmunks said penis and then they all started calling them penis's . heres a cookie , good question
plop fire what is your show cool plop ive never seen it it must be so cool they cant play it on tv Sent In By :[email protected] REPLY: hhahah your soo funny , our show is awesome and we arent too cool to be on tv , the problem is just that the tv station wants to give us 45 cagillion dollars and we really dont need that money so we turned down that offer , we already get that kind of money from people like heather brooks wen she bids on our underwhare. but neways , thats the reason a penis is called a penis .
Hey you guys rule , your show kiks , i hope you make it big . lata , Jon Kretun Sent In By : [email protected] REPLY:thank you jon , you "kik" too , have a cookie .
Mark the Umans rode around on dunkays at the ranch. And then the umans they went kikkk with their heads in pllp with that. You guys gotta do the show more so zak get back up here. Don't forget you promised me and megz!!! Bye guys...good job good jog...lata Sent In By : [email protected] REPLY:ok well after much thought and studying of this i have come to one conclusion . i think that you were drunk wher you wrote this letter . meg you know what i have told you about bieng drunk . look at all the mispronunciations ??!! and what is the word jog?? or how about pllp??!! but anyways stay off the booze and have a cookie to fill that unbearable craving for alchahol . PEACE
yo man, i want to see you guys stroke some animals, preferably horses,they have big schlongs, maybe you can make them jiz on a cookie and give it too some bitch, well anyways, i need to know somethin, why do monkeys drink their own pee, i just wantd to know, alright see ya Sent In By : [email protected] REPLY: ok now for the last and final time . we do not like to stroke animals genital areas . and bitch is not an acceptable word to use on the mark and zak show homepage . noone likes a poo poo mouth . the correct term would be young lady . from now on anyone who sends in bad letters about animal stroking is going to get a lasty virus on their computer and it will show animals masterbating and it will blow up your computer . and to answer about the pee . well this goes back to a time where monkeys were living in a ancient city . remember in that movie the jungle book?? well thats what happened . they were all walking around and they were just playing and they were thirsty i guess so they drank their pee .you happy now???? you can have a cookie too but you know what theres gonna be "Jizz" all over it . come on eat that sucker ........ yummm huh . well thats how your "bitch" would feel . and by the way the correct term is semen . and if this is nick thibeault then ........ your a meanie . Peace
Hey guys whats up? This is really funny! Zak-see you in Mr.Shaver's class. (Can I get a cookie, please?) Sent In By : [email protected] REPLY:yea i know its funny and thats why we're the mark and zak show .you cant have a cookie . PEACE
yo waht teh dilly? dude i cant wait to get teh show started again i mean we need to get a rrested this time or atleaset banned from a store and if we are real lucky mybe get sued by the leominster police...yo fool ill see ya when you come back,zak...haha that rhymes. well later fool PEACE LOVE POKEMON. your oen and only partner on crim, mark yes i am from teh mark and zak show....later my super freak Sent In By : Mark REPLY:Yo YO Yo wat up my supa freaky g-funk . dude we're def gonna get arrested . but anyways for everyone whos readin this , the scoop on me comin home is just that i have a trial in mass in november . actually i dont know the exact date . im kinda waitin for that . im comin home for thanksgivin and hopefully just staying . i thknk the dates are the 18-28 . but anyways heres a little sneak preview for everyone for things that are new on the show . we're gonna try to get on fitchburg access . something different realli sucks and so dosent every other wannabe show like the blair fitch project and crap like that . but we're thinkin bout snowboardin in our red speedos . we're probally gonna catch nmonia or somethin but its all for the good of the show . PEACE
mark is the man and i don't know zac but u guys gots to go down to like kmart or somethin on a lark and knock everythin ova SENT IN BY:[email protected] REPLY:yo yo yo wat up g-funk . dude we'll do that . but wats a lark??? can someone tell me? but anyways we're thinkin about talkin to donald the mentally challenged man . good idea huh? u can have a cookie . PEACE LOVE POKEMON
hi zak this is alana....from math...umm...this webpage is really funny and i laugh because i have no idea of whats going on. do u have aol? ok anywayz...hi mark i dont know u but you're still cool. ok ill shut up now.haha bubye!! ~*~alana~*~ SENT IN BY : [email protected] REPLY: Yo Yo Wat up , umm....i pee because my genitals hurt , and i drink because i am thirsty . we both have aol , marks name is djchicken2cool and zak's name is surfdj360 . and mark is awesome and he is the number 1 ladies man . ok illshut up . PEACE LOVE POKEMON
what?! no cookie?! SENT IN BY:[email protected] REPLY:Im sorry DEAR . you can have a cookie .
I was readin the stuff on your page, and I have NO idea how I ended up at this page. But it seems like your show is fucking hilarious!!! I was wondering if you guys could send me a copy of the show? I would REALLY like to see it!!! Well thanx and lata.... ME SENT IN BY:[email protected] REPLY: yo yo yo wat up all my pokemon masters . if u havent checked the pokemon movie came out on wednesday the 12 any boy ohhhh boy i have one word to say about it...............RADICAl . it was the best movie ive ever seen and the mark and zak show gives it 2 BIG BIG BIG thumbs up . but anyways about your question . thanks for writing us . we will send u a copy of the show . just e-mail the show at [email protected] and tell us your address . we'll hook u up good . but anyways , tell ure friends about all our stuff . PEACE LOVE POKEMON . have a cookie .
what's up?.....Zak how are ya hun?...that's awesome about u coming home for thanksgiving and hopefully staying....hope to see you soon! Mark Keep up the good work kiddo! i love ya! <3 always ~KW SENT IN BY :[email protected] REPLY: Yo yo wat up kristen , everythins cool here in sunny florida . im comin back for thanksgivin . lots and lots of people know bout the show now , its realli cool . i cant wait to be home . i just been hangin out and wakeboardin . i cant wait to do the show . watch out fitchburg !! ok i gg PEACE LOVE POKEMON . love zak
Yo Zak what up? You know who I am. See Five Iron Frenzy? I didn't go to Pennywise, even though that girl was willing to take me. SENT IN BY:[email protected] REPLY: ok see this is one of these letters that we get every once and a while and they pretty much just dont make sense . ok now lets see . u know who i am?? well no i dont . ok now the next thing . see five iron frenzy . hmmm well that is not ever a real question . ok now I didn't to Pennywise, even though that girl was willing to take me. ok well this is interesting too . thats great . all i can say is that if some girl is willing to take you then u should go . PEACE LOVE POKEMON
SENT IN BY : [email protected] REPLY: hmm well this guy is a real silly billy . didnty even finish his last letter . wow that is realli cool . PEACE LOVE POKEMON
U ARE ALL STUPID. I THINK THAT EVERTHING U DO SUX AND IF I EVER SEE YOU SENT IN BY:[email protected](yea right like theres even a address like that) REPLY:Well i have one thing to say to you...........Jesus loves you . SEND MAIL TO US HERE!!!